Sexuality and Grades
A very close friend of mine came to me crying yesterday, about how she was embarrassed so I to force the story out of her. According to this friend, the whole journey started in year one when she and her friend had gone to a professor's office to pay for a textbook he was selling. When she got there, he was writing a journal which he asked their opinion on and they gave him. He felt impressed and requested they come the next day to his office. They went the next day, as requested and that day’s topic was homosexuality, she, being a supporter of the LGBT community, told him it wasn’t these LGBTs fault they turned out like that and as the argument proceeded he opened his laptop and played a pornography to show and further explain to them about sex. She felt it was probably for his research so she was less bothered. Time went by and he made sure they visited at least twice a week to discuss moral issues which she didn’t see anything wrong with. It was all good until he became the Head of Department and the full harassment started. He began to show signs like sit on my lap or you will probate and so on and as a naive freshman she had to do it to save her grades. Fast forward to the end of her first year when she needed an important document signed by the HOD, she met him and he told her to go on vacation and not to worry about it. She felt happy until in October, he called her to come to school the next day to get the document signed or she should forget. She rushed to school even though she lived in a far state. On getting there, she stayed a month filled with sexual assault of different kinds during vacation just to get her document signed. She couldn’t complain since she knew the document was her life. Her friend resumed at the end of November and on a Sunday, he requested to see them concerning the document so they rushed to his office where he attempted to rape them with his fellow professors. She had to call her parents who directed her to talk to a Dean in the University about the issue before taking it further legally. When she got there, all what the Dean could say was for her to exercise patience and to stay away from him but he can’t do anything to his “man”. She felt hurt and left in anger. She decided to blacklist his number and refused to go to class in the first semester of her sophomore year, but she felt running away from him was not the solution. She decided to resume classes until this second semester when he saw her in class and called her friend and her to his office where he insulted and threatened them to follow him to the Staff Club with nine other girls who were below eighteen years. On getting to the Club, they discovered he wanted to exchange them for drinks and money to the Vice Chancellor, some Deans and other big professors. She felt embarrasbsed and later understood what that professor who was supposed to help her said that “it’s about playing your card right. Everyone is in this together “.
So I asked about the document and she said it later became useless and I felt her pain. I also asked if she has ever tried recording a session of the harassment and she said, he won’t even allow anyone use a phone as you must switch it off or see his wrath. Another friend from a different school shared a story of how her lecturer changed her grade in her presence because she refused to give him a blowjob. It’s painful, the rate at which young people fear going to higher institutions to study because of sexual harassment from school authorities. It isn’t only female who suffer from this problem but men also as some female lecturers threaten to fail them if they don’t have sex with them.
The Society is decaying and everyone is watching the fire burning. It should be known that no one wishes to be assaulted but they still fall victim. It isn’t about the dressing or anything. A student once asked this question “what if you have been repeating your final year for three years and knowing if you don’t pass the course the third time, you might only get a Vice Chancellor voice note as a certificate, won’t you do it so as not to waste the time, money and energy spent in studying? “.
We can keep blaming the victims for giving in, but all I see is predators who are forever waiting, for the perfect opportunity to feast on the vulnerability of these female students, using the fear of losing a degree. Some offer tihemselves, true! But the university community has shapened their mentality into sex for grades. We often hear of complaints about, half-baked graduates. The best are those who knew the "way" while the best are left with rest of the crumbs that falls off the table of employment. Women and men no longer feel safe in the university. Young men, engaging in criminal activities in order to keep up with the expensive lifestyle, lecturers make them live, in order to have a peaceful stay during university days. No where feels safe anymore as it is now of a game of survival.
The government should establish a law concerning this undignifying act and listen to these victims' story more as the only safe place to share it is on social media where you can pose anonymous and avoid threats. Also these harassers should remember there is a tomorrow where their actions will speak on their behalf. Thank you.
-Omoregie Mary Osaretin
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